Flirting can be seen as physical or emotional infidelity. But views on cheating may differ based on boundaries and rules set within a relationship.

When you’re attracted to someone, flirting is a way of communicating that interest through subtle (or not-so-subtle) cues. You may tilt your head to one side, slightly change the tone of your voice, or adjust your posture, for example.

Some of these cues may be subconscious, and some may be intentional. So, how do you determine: “Is flirting cheating, or isn’t it?”

While there may be undeniable moments when flirting crosses a line, mutual consent, clarity in your relationship, and underlying intent can all be important factors when deciding if flirting is infidelity.

Openly talking about your and your partner’s expectations and your willingness to honor those is a healthy way of getting on the same page and establishing if flirting is cheating or if it gets too close to it for comfort.

“For some, flirting is infidelity. For others, [cheating is] exclusively sexual acts. For others still, [infidelity is] any emotional closeness that should be reserved for a primary partner or significant other,” says Jeanae Hopgood, a licensed ily therapist from Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania. “Ultimately, couples need to discuss the rules and boundaries for their specific relationship to avoid crossing lines.”

In many cases, flirting is cheating when your partner doesn’t approve or your actions can go against the relationship or your partner.